The Sinner & the Saint exchanging notes

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Last week’s blog gave a little bit more insight into the phenomenon of our shadow. This week’s blog will be about finding our shadow and moving beyond it. As our shadow can be a catalyst for growth, that gives us an opportunity to reclaim a hidden part of ourselves that will allow us to experience more balance and freedom in our lives.

How to find your shadow?
If we explore our behavioral patterns, especially the ones we don’t wish to repeat, we always uncover a shadow aspect of ourselves that we are trying to hide or cover up. Those patterns stem from an original wound that we are covering up by creating patterns of behavior that ultimately reinforce the wound rather than giving us the relief we are looking for. To get more insights into these negative behavioral patterns ask yourself “what kind of person would do x, y or z?” The answer will be your clue. You probably became the opposite of what you just defined, to make sure you would never do x, y or z. You will then need to break the cycle by confronting the distaste you feel for x, y or z. Start looking for the positives that this certain trait/emotion could bring you. What could be the right amount of this trait/emotion in your life? When you approach it from this angle, it is easier to see that real freedom is all about being able to choose whoever and whatever we want to be at any moment in our life.

When we are reclaiming these unwanted parts of ourselves, it is very important to remember that we are doing this to bring the best out of ourselves. I would like to quote Carl Jung again who said “I’d rather be whole than good”…

 

Source: The Shadow Effect by D. Chopra, D. Ford & M. Williamson