A big ego might seem handy when you want to achieve a lot in life, however, it could be a burden as well. The same goes for a small ego. In both cases fear and insecurity lie at the root of it. How do we deal with ego’s? And what is an ego exactly?
There is no easy answer to these questions. We kind of know what the word ego means, however, an exact definition is difficult to find. A generic response would be the “I-feeling” that we have. The way we relate to people and things around us. Our ego is a mask that we show to the outside world.
This could explain sometimes the big ego’s we see with executives, top athletes and celebrities. People that are visible, often also feel vulnerable and they cover this up by wearing a “mask”. We all meet people in our lives with big ego’s and subsequently struggle with their exaggerated sense of importance. Depending on our own ego we either might feel small or we might be able to deal with them in a gracious way, not really being affected. While dealing with a pompous ego it might help to realize that this behavior is in fact a survival strategy in order to not having to feel distrust or insecurity. People with big egos have trouble listening to criticism so try combining criticism with appreciation.
Now how do we recognize a small ego? These are the people that tend to worry a lot. They agonize about what other people might think of them and are fearful of saying something wrong. They struggle to articulate what they really want or need and have trouble putting boundaries in place. They are mostly easy to be with as they tend to be compliant as they want everybody to have a good time.
And what about our own ego? How do we manage that?
I personally like the quote of Robin Sharma who says “leave your ego at the door every morning, and just do some truly great work. Few things will make you feel better than a job brilliantly done.”